It's bad enough dealing with a broken leg and the problems that causes. It causes even more problems when you live alone, are very single, and when your commute isn't conducive to getting around on crutches. Let's not even get into things like medical bills.
Here I sit yet again waiting for my next follow up. I'm not holding my breath this time, expecting bad news (even though there's really no good reason to be expecting bad news, at least judging by how my leg feels). I've got ducks lined up for best and worst case scenarios, including use of small motorcycle to solve my commute woes. As far as my truck goes - well, I'm mostly screwed in that department. I'll be back to driving it whether I'm "released" for it or not. I'm planning two very different sets of weekend plans - one if things go well, one if they go poorly.
I'm obviously hoping for good news, but learned my lesson the last time and am assuming things won't go well, and plan B is about as solidified as plan A. I'm still super moody. Sometimes, in the moment, I can be happy and ignoring the situation, but it doesn't take much to get a brutal reminder of just how things really are. Even when things are feeling better, I'm getting constant reminders of just how miserable this recovery is going to be - and that's without extra complications!
On a good note, that fracture blister is FINALLY healing over - it's now rather tiny, and mostly closed over, just a tiny spot left and it's steadily been closing in. I've never fought a wound that long...so glad to finally have some noticeable progress.
My ortho mentioned something about internal infections from the hardware that show up weeks after surgery - I don't think there was a particular reason other than the slow healing on the blister sore (but I think I know why that slowed and it wasn't because of something along that line). But I've thought about it a couple times - will need to do more reading up on that. I've heard of it happening to people, and at this point I have delusions that I'm special. Not sure how'd you even know about it if you're feeling fine otherwise???
48 more hours until I'm sitting in his office wondering what he's going to tell me. I think I'm mostly dreading it this time, convinced it won't be good news. Although, good news or not, I'm making plans of getting back on bikes regardless. A little bike on the street that I can manage with one leg, and plans to get on my race bike at the next track day and at least do some slow laps even if I need help getting on and off the bike in the pits. My mind needs the release - mentally I feel like I'm falling apart, holding it together with a thin thread that keeps getting stretched. Even super slow laps on a bike, or simply commuting in on the freeway at 5am to avoid traffic would do wonders for my soul right now....
No comments:
Post a Comment